So many people profess to love you and say they are loyal yet the first sign that their ego may be threatened and they will cut your  throat, metaphorically speaking of course. Here is a news flash, for most people are loyal only at the wims of their own ego! And what exactly is this ego anyway. In a nut shell, its all that you think that you are..more on that later!

True loyalty does not fade or diminish just because your friend or family does not behave or act in a way that you deem to be satisfactory. What about the months, years or decades of great love or friendship?  If you are loyal, you stay loyal…most cannot, then they are not your real friends. Don’t say to someone that you are a loyal friend and then keep secrets behind their back.

The worst kind of loyalty is to say to a friend ” I have heard things about you but I cannot tell you who has been talking about you.”  That is deceitful friendship. If you are truly a loyal friend, and someone is talking about you behind your back, you will say; ” I am sorry that you are talking about such and such this way, and I will have to tell them what you have said.”  That is a mark of a loyal friend that will watch your back no matter what, and this is usually because they have a deep love and respect for you as a human and your humaness and not for who they think you are.

How many of these friends (including family) do you really have?

Don’t make a mistake, don’t slip up, don’t be human, because if you do, you will see who your real friends are when the dust settles. Remember what Jesus said ” he who has never sinned let him be the first to cast the stone.”  

Your ego is your driving force! It is what compels you to comment. Teaching some one about their ego is the most dangerous path because it will threaten the fabric of their very existence. Funny because it is only through the release of the ego that ends suffering and opens the way to true consciousness, true happiness and true bliss. This cannot be understood by the conscious mind as it is the ego trying to understand the ego, or as they say in Japan, “the sword cannot cut itself.”

So when I hear someone say that such and such is all ego or has a big ego, I have to agree, but not in their sense of what ego is.  We are all ego, so you cannot have a big ego as ego is all there is in most people and they are compelled, driven by it, and unless there is an opening or understanding of what ego really is, the monkey will always be driving your bus and there will always be suffering.

I tried to teach this at my martial arts school but only save this most valuable lesson for my most loyal students.



  1. Richard Holdstock on April 1, 2010 at 1:24 am

    Sadly the human mind can always justify disloyalty

  2. Andy Dickinson on April 1, 2010 at 1:58 am

    Thanks Richard, your comment is direct and to the point. The human mind can justify almost anything until we come to observe that which we are not.


  3. andrew m on April 2, 2010 at 7:47 am

    We all look for so much from people in our lives, we put exceptation above reality.Dont look at the little picture all the time when it comes to friends and family, dont look for that excuse to get upset, relise that at times we all strugle with anything and everything have a forgiving nature and take ture friendship on a daily level. most of all dont have agends with those you care most about. Our lives are to short to build mountains no bodies going to climb.
    Happy Easter
    Thanks for a great start to 2010 Andy
    Andrew m

  4. Ed on April 6, 2010 at 11:20 pm

    Loyalty..deceit, trust..betayal. 2 sides of the same sword, with one we defend, with the other we cut. We must learn to wield ourselves with care.

  5. selma on May 20, 2010 at 6:45 am

    There is also the argument that the Ego is not an acquired state of each individual based on their particular life experience but a generically passed down pre-determined state.

    There is a lot of buzz in the scientific and new age spiritual communities regarding a “universal field of consciousness” outside that of the ego. The idea is that once the human mind is aware that such a state exists it may be able to step outside of the ego and experience a divine state of existence.

    If we were pre-programmed, so to speak, based on our genes, then there are many more differences between us then we think. The more differences, the harder it is so see “eye to eye” (ultimately). The argument suggests that my experience of “the universal state of consciousness” may be vastly different to yours and we may never be able to compare the two because they exists outside of the materialistic world as we know it.

    Having said that, the idea of “a universal state of consciousness” certainly helps us think that we are all a part of something bigger and wonderful and that we can all experience it and therefore end our earthly woes and common bickering.

    Unless someone is genetically programmed to be an ass***** in which case their view of “the universal state of consciousness” may be vastly different to yours.

    Collectiveness or individualism.. what was the subject.. loyalty. yes this is important too…

  6. Dave on May 26, 2010 at 12:26 am

    Love the picture of the hands on hands on hands…….
    To be present with the moment at hand not before or into the future but right now…. all talk and no loyalty is quite common.
    What use is it to destroy someone elses-line/path/name when you hav’nt taken the courtesy to improve your own ….. lack of loyalty for self!!
    Andy this is all to common with the mouth warriors, name droppers and so on….
    To the point great read.

    Tatakawa Zushite katsu

    Happy Days

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